Sports Names

Legend has it that the word “golf” is an acronym derived from the old rule that said this was a game for Gentlemen Only – Ladies Forbidden.  (My wife, who has played 180 rounds of golf so far this year, tells me this is not true.)

Names for other sports seem logical:

Basketball started when guys started trying to toss a ball into a mounted peach basket.

Baseball certainly makes sense, since bases are a critical element of the game.

Football was a contest in which the feet were used much more extensively than they are today.  From its beginnings around 1865 until 1906, there was no forward pass.  You advanced and scored by using your feet.

However, maybe it’s time to change the name of our more-popular sports in light of their evolution over the years.

Instead of basketball, how about blackball?  During the 2008-2009 NBA season, 82% of the players were black.  (This in a country where only 12.85% of the population is black.)  They could also play with an ebony-colored leather ball. 

Instead of baseball, how about brownball?  Latinos now hold 29% of roster spots in MLB.  (By the way, the percentage of black players is down to just 9%.)  I suppose the cowhide balls could be brown instead of white; but this would give the pitchers a distinct advantage.

Instead of golf, how about white ball?  Remove Tiger, and the handful of Asians on the tour and all you have left is a bunch of white guys.  (And they already use a white ball.)

Perhaps, instead of renames based on racial trends, we can think of some names that more appropriately reflect the nature of the games today.

Instead of football, how about bruteball?  Or passball? 

Instead of baseball, how about beanball?  Or batball?  Gopherball? 

Instead of basketball, how about dunkball?  Or hoopball?  Or my favorite these days…either palmball or travelball.

So….now the big question.  Where did we ever come up with the name soccer?  (Somebody look that up and get back to me.)  Instead of soccer, I’d opt to just call the game boredomball.  Of course, “boredomball moms” just doesn’t have the same ring to it.